The most amazing thing has happened!

I’ve just had an actual experience of ‘When you let go and let God.’ You know, things have a funny way of working out. (As long as you do it with genuine kindness and not resentment!)
I had a big test recently, a humanity test, and I had to ask God to guide me. I wasn’t sure if God wanted me to be completely selfless as I would have in the past or in this case to be selfish and put my own needs first.
Now, you know I have just started to discover myself in my last three years of writing and I’ve shared a lot about myself in my book, ‘My Beautiful Flower’ and my blog page, the mistakes I’ve made, lessons I’ve learned and how to make things right.
I certainly feel more comfortable in myself these days, so I think I’m on the right road.
When I was in the debts of my depression, one of the things I couldn’t do was look at my phone for messages or even answer it. I know it’s sounds strange, but I would delete messages even without looking at them. I would delete voice messages while holding the phone away from me, not wanting to hear anyone’s kind or inquisitive voice. I remember at the time that I couldn’t do anything for anybody and I didn’t want to let them down, so I couldn’t acknowledge the call.
I think when my mind was sick, it couldn’t handle any pressure at all or anymore responsibilities it already had.
Anyway, I still am very cautious about looking at my phone when I receive messages. It’s also a deliverer of insults too and I had made those mistakes also, sending messages of insults and abuse in my time of resentments. I’m not proud of my actions and now, incoming messages are a reminder of the pain a phone can deliver.
 I’m not one of these people who will look at the phone straight away and give instant gratification to the caller. In fact, if I have to send a message to someone to say I have to let them down, I put my phone where I can’t see it or I turn it off! So now you know why you don’t get me immediately!
When I do pick up my phone mostly the next morning, I kind of look at it sideways to see how bad the news is going to be! It’s crazy but true!
Well, in my recent test from God, I decided I had to be selfish. I didn’t rush into it. I thought it through. I felt it was the right decision for me, my family and indeed the person involved. So, I did feel in my gut I had the support from God.
 So I let it Go. I continued on my walks and thanking God for my gifts in life and asking him to guide me and help this person in the situation.
And as it turned out, the person was able to take responsibility and find a solution!
When I looked at my phone this morning with a sideways glance, I got good news!
So maybe I passed the test from God?
xxx Jean

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1 thought on “The most amazing thing has happened!

  1. I'm not sure I understand what you “let go.” I understand you screen your phone calls and I think I understood that you have a friend with a problem right now. You turned to God for help and then got good news. Am I right? If so, that might be the time to say “I let God.” I'm not sure what you let go. Sorry, but I'm confused.


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